I have two Twitter accounts–@joshspilker and @joshspilkerplus. Since I contain multitudes, one Twitter account would not do. I use the @joshspilker to talk about “normal” life, mostly sports, local restaurants, politics, marketing and spiritual stuff. Then I use the @joshspilkerplus as my “creative” account or something and that one is where I try out “funny” phrases with literary stuff.
Sometime last fall, a Twitter parody account of me started. I have no why. In fact, many people accuse me of starting it. But I didn’t. I swear. Everyone thinks it weird. Whoever runs it takes some of my interests and then just writes ingenious stuff about it–mostly Kmart and tacos and the NBA with some random references to my books. My wife thinks this person is funnier than me.
It only has like 48 followers. I mean, I would hope for more, but that really is a true gauge of my cultural influence.
I needed to hear more from this voice inside my head that wasn’t inside my head. So I asked him some questions over Twitter, naturally.
q.1 which ‘semi-popular’ restaurants do you prefer? pls advise
jspilkerminus: man, so many 2 choose from but right now i’m partial 2 the closed down ‘TGI Fridays’ a couple blocks from my house. follow up, this is not made up, i’ll post a pic of this ‘TGI Fridays’ nxt time I drive by (ed. note: jspilkerminus did not post)
q.2 what are yr feelings abt 1) kmart 2) target 3) walmart pls advise
jspilkerminus: 1)under 2) properly and 3) overrated
q.3 what’s the ‘right way’ to create a personal ‘brand’ ???
jspilkerminus: in my case ‘coopt’ someone else’s ‘personal brand’ then make ‘jokes’
q.4 what makes the perfect ‘taco’ ???
jspilkerminus: from a truck or gas station. alternatively one with a hard shell of ‘irony’ and a soft meat filling of ‘sincerity’
q.5 who did you ‘support’ in the NBA playoffs ???
jspilkerminus: he last 1 standing w. a ‘balding’ ‘european’ center so the wizards and gortat. mozgov still has 2 much hair
q.6 why start a ‘parody acct’ of josh spilker? he has ‘very little’ to ‘no’ influence imo
jspilkerminus: good q, i have been a j spilker ‘fan’ for awhile and i always thought it was kinda fun that he had 2 twitter accts…so i thought i would take it to the ‘nxt level’ and start a 3rd to crack a few jokes. i also thought that..the irony/sincerity of a parody acct of some1 w. selfdescibed ‘very little’ to ‘no’ influnce isn’t lost on anyone
q.7 do u think ‘taco jehovah’ will be ‘exceptional’ or just ‘something to start a campfire with?’
jspilkerminus:prob better than ‘campfire’ unless the ‘campfire’ is used to make ‘open flame roasted’ tacos
q.8 what should josh spilker write about next?
jspilkerminus:a sports book w. similar energy to ‘ambient fla position’ would be amazing
and by ‘sports’ i obv mean nba. mebbe the ‘nets’ move to nashville and u can’t really tell if the book is being serious or not.
q.9 what other questions should i ‘ask’?
jspilkerminus: i think u just abt covered ‘it’ we should do ‘this’ again
q. 10 what will happen in the ‘future’?
jspilkerminus:kmart ‘in business’ just long enough to stock hoverboards but will then fold so get yr hoverboard on clearance at kmart